Movie Review - The Lesson

The Lesson

2015

The Cast

I was really looking forward to this tale of revenge and learning as the premise sounded entertaining.  A teacher, Mr Gale (Hands), who is ridiculed daily by his students, decides to take matters into his own hands and to elevate their learning curves by some extreme teaching methods.

You do get what you expect; there are some nasty scenes of violence and abuse.  The scene where Mr Gale nails the hand of his student, Fin (Bendall), to the desk looks realistic.  It's the realism which could have made this movie something special.

I've known families like Fin's and his brother's, Jake (Cox), where the brothers don't get on... to the point of arguing, fighting, and forsaking.  I've also known the senseless bullies of Fin and Joel's (Coltart) order.  Though I do hope that the scene in the schoolroom isn't that realistic - if it is, I pity the teachers and can understand the twenty-six-grand to study to teach the government are offering.

The trouble starts when you get to the tortuous indoctrination.  Through all of the bleakness, we are then subjected to a gayfull and lunatic lesson.  This departs from reality and enters the demented.  Which, in itself wouldn't be a bad thing had Mr Gale been suffering from a mental break.  However, this doesn't appear to be the case.  Then when you throw in Fin's delusion it was enough to wrench me away from the film, thinking, what the hell(?).  From here the story and character of Mr Gale become preposterous and unbelievable.  I felt that both the writer and the director, Ruth Platt, were trying too hard to get their point across, making the story appear pompous and pretentious.

It's from here on in that the film falls apart.

The really ludicrous thing is the scene where Jake's Girlfriend, Tanja (Gavanski), is accosted and forced to join in the lesson.  She's worried that Fin's not come home, though his brother doesn't give a damn, so she sets out to find him.  She wanders the town aimlessly and just by coincidence comes across Mr Gale.  This is absurd because the abduction takes place outside.  How did Mr Gale know she was there, let alone that she had an interest in one of his captives.

Then there's the timeline which is totally cockeyed by the end of the film.  So what started out as an okay film drops into a quagmire of below average revenge torture fodder.

If you like your revenge stories and can empathise with teachers then this may be worth a watch, though it could have been much better and even could have made a statement.  Though I would say you'd be better off with the Hostel or Saw franchises.

I give this Over-Inflated Study Session A Haughty 5 out of 10. 

The Trailer

Movie Review - The Collection

The Collection

2012

The Cast

Though this is the sequel to "The Collector" and ties in well with the ending of the first film, it actually has very little to do with the original.  For starters, you have to forget the premise of the first as well as The Collectors modus operandi.  Like the original, these films work well if you don't think... at all.  Once you do you'll start spotting the massive gaping flaws in the story.  So in this chapter, The Collector has upped his game and has gone after a club full of young adults.  From which one survives.  Luckily for her, she has a loving and rich father who will do anything to get her back... so he sends in his own band of mercenaries to get her out... okay, everybody, let's march into the blood-spattered decrepit hotel and chant at the top of your voices, "Let's Go Die, Let's Go Die".  And so the carnage continues.

The thing which made the previous film so good is the same thing that makes this... the tension and suspense.  Dunstan is a maestro at manipulating the pace and atmosphere to get you on the edge of your seat.  Every time a trap is sprung you wonder how nasty it'll be... answer... very nasty.  That's the second thing keeping the audiences attention, the kills and the action.  There is a tonne of gore, enough to keep Hershall Lewis smiling in heaven, and plenty enough for the gorehounds.

Stewart is much better as Arkin in this film.  It would appear that being the collector's plaything has added an extra depth or two to him.  His motivation to escape is evident in every scene he's in.  Lee Tergesen does a passable job as the hired killer Lucello.  However, the rest of his merry men are ten-a-penny redshirts... proper cannon fodder.  So, it would appear that the writers decided not to fill out their characters too much.  Then there was Fitzpatrick as Elena, who was okay while she didn't say anything.  However, when she did speak she spoke with wooden tongue.

The special effects were awesome, the re-breaking of Arkin's arm and the escape attempt is quite nearly sickening.  The sewn together body parts is eerie and disturbing.  And the traps are gruesome and deadly.  Hopefully, all of this should be enough to satisfy, who needs a story, right(?)

The story really could have made this into a better and stronger film.  In the original, all you had to do was forget that it takes time to jerry-rig a house with all the traps, the collector used - forgivable, for entertainment's sake.

The character of the collector breaks into a house and leaves a present for the homeowners.  A trunk, inside of which is a tortured person from his previous escapade.  This "Present" is for shock value to throw the prey into confusion and fear.  Then he sets about torturing and killing everyone, but one, in the house... nobody lives.

This is even mentioned on a TV News Broadcast in the sequel.  There's been a spree of home invasions with this MO.  Even though it's the police being interviewed in the broadcast there appears to be no manhunt for The Collector.  No Task Force.  No FBI.  Then there's a party at a secret location... not too secret as TC's had time to set up a really nasty combine harvester trap, which is rigged to the trunk, hidden away in one of the rooms of the derelict house.  Boy, he was really hoping that somebody would be curious enough to go looking through a condemned building, so they'd set the trap off.

Then when we get to his hotel it just gets worse.  Not only does this killer torture and murder homeowners but he must also be picking up people off the street judging by the number of dismembered cadavers laying around...  Not only that, but he now has "The Collection" roaming around the place too.  People too scared to try and escape.  Most of which are high on drugs.  TC must be cooking the stuff or he really is one sick rich dude.  However, the strange thing is the traps in this place... a place that's his so he has all the time in the world to construct the best traps ever,  but are really weak-assed.  One of them is a hallway of plywood with nails knocked through them.  They don't even move together.  Another is a hallway full of bear traps.  Which you can easily get through by just walking to the side of them.  Damn this place really needed Kevin McCallister's touch.

Then there's the stitched together body parts.  Looks, like TC's been watching The Human Centipede, what a sicko...  This absolutely breaks with his persona.  There is no way that he would do this.  And then to arrange them in some kind of fluid inside glass canisters... believability is out the window.

Had the writers chosen, not to go down this path but to remain on the original and begin to explain TC's psychosis and background a little then it would have only helped to define the character better.  The strongest films give their audience an inkling into the psychopath and his thinking.  You know what's eating Norman, what's driving Michael, why Freddy is so evil, and even Jason gets a backstory and motivation.  These add to the power of their characters and hopefully the films.

If you're a gorehound then this film is definitely for you.  If you don't like blood then I'd recommend you stay away.

I give this a blood-soaked and gore-stained 6 out of 10.

The Trailer

Movie Review - Midnight Fear

Midnight Fear

1991

The Cast

I really enjoyed this dark and brooding psychological whodunnit.  A woman is murdered in a most unpleasant way.  She has her foot severed at the ankle.  She is then skinned alive.  When she is finally dead the killer decides now would be the best time for some sex...  Yuck!  On the scene of the crime is Detective Hanley (Carradine) who, having seen more than his fair share of depravity, chooses alcohol as his work partner of choice.  Meanwhile, across on the other side of the town, a couple of men have turned up at a farm looking for a telephone as their car has broken down.  At the stables, they find Jenny, who is house and horse sitting for her friend while she and her brother go on spring break.  There's something not quite right about these brothers, Paul (Wasson) and John (Fletcher)...

It's at this point that the story starts to get good and twisty.  The trouble is that the writers and director go a little heavy-handedly about dropping hints as to the twists in the story.  I have to admit this was the only off-putting thing in the film for me.  Apart from these little bits, the story is strong and well structured.  But the best thing about it is the ending, which is brilliant, and probably one of the truest endings on film - as well as the most ironic.

The acting is above average and I found all the characters to be realistic and believable... except for one scene towards the climax of the film.  This had John and Jenny playing out a scene.  It's Jenny's behaviour, at this point that really angered me.  The character that we've seen, up to this point, wouldn't do, act, or say the things she does in this scene.   I know that's vague but I don't want to spoil the film for anyone.  And besides, this is only a slight annoyance and shouldn't stop anyone from watching this film.  But when you get to this scene and you'll know and be ready for it.  I think this flick also shows how underrated David Carradine was as an actor.  He really does get the alcoholic detective fighting the monkey on his back down pat.  It's not Oscar material, but it is good.

And I have to give respect to Bill Crain who was great at using light to create atmosphere and tension... some of it is pretty striking while others are quite subtle.  Take the climax around the pool, very artistic.  I also loved how he ceased all sound when you were looking out of John's eyes as he was a deaf-mute.  This added a different perspective, even if it was just a few seconds at a time.  There are some really nice camera shots too.  The climax in the bedroom is especially beautiful and sad, as well as being beautifully lit.

Though this isn't the greatest film ever made it does have a lot going for it.  It's one film that I wouldn't mind watching again... maybe, even a few times.  I would say to all psychological thriller lovers, murder mystery fans, armchair detectives, and whodunnit pundits give this one a go - it's worth it.

I give this a skinned and bloody 6.75 out of 10.

The Trailer

Movie Review - The Wrong Nanny

The Wrong Nanny

2017

The Cast

This is a clever little tale which has a pretty good twist to the main plot, though even a couch-potato will be able to work it out quite early on.  It's just a shame everything else about the movie isn't up to that standard.

Please be aware that you will need to watch an awful opening sequence.  This is both badly acted and scripted.  However, it's not shot too badly.  But once you're past this and into the story proper then things do lift... a little.

The main bother I had with the story was the whole "Fund Raising" arc.  No matter how much I didn't try to think it out, I still couldn't relate to the fact that, mother of two, Stella (Hartley) would even consider hanging around with the self-gratifying Meredith (Williamson) and her kowtowing minions.  Let alone, try to impress her.  This entire scenario was filled with such stereotypical fodder that it muddled the main storyline; this should have been a better arc.

Secondly, the acting was all over the place.  This could be due to the out of sequence shooting of the scenes, because Freya Tingley (Blake), would be dire in one scene and then pretty decent in the next.  It really does disjoint the film to have this kind of acting difference.  The rest of the cast was pretty average, though Brody Hutzler (Tanner) and Bree Williamson (Meredith) do add a bit of solidness with their portrayal of their characters.    Though, I think the trouble with Lindsay Hartley's character is due to the writing and direction, rather than her acting.  There were quite a few things that weren't completely believable with Stella.

Though the story is strong in its synopsis, it does let itself down on some of the narration and stereotypical characters.  There's also the obvious antagonising scenes where we get to see Blake's real character and motivation.  The number of times that their friend's daughter, Julianna (Green) told Stella that she was like a mother to her was near vomit inducing.  Some of these scenes appeared forced and there were too many.

This film would have been so much better with these issues sorted out.  But even though there were a few annoyances it still is a good film, not great.

For the most part, the direction and pace are standard and steady, not adding anything new to the film.  The acting levels out at average.  And the story is better and stronger for the character of Blake and her background.

If there's a rainstorm or blizzard blazing outside then spending an afternoon with this flick wouldn't be too bad.

I give this bad nanny an average 5.5 out of 10.

The Trailer

Movie Review - Fatal Trust

Fatal Trust

2006

The Cast

This film actually surprised me by how good it was.  Now I'm not saying it's brilliant, I'm not!  Though for a daytime TV movie this is good fare.

Kate (Johnson) and her son have suffered the violent loss of a lover and father so she decides it's time to leave the city and head home, where her sister, Jessica (Alt), runs a diner.  As she's pulling into town, she passes an accident where a woman has died of a heart attack while driving.  As time passes, Kate begins to learn that this isn't the first heart attack in the small town.  Could her new boss, Dr Lucas (Haydn-Jones), be behind the deaths in some way(?)   So she sets out to find out the truth.

Here is the first thing I think could have been better.  It would have been a stronger storyline had we not been shown the killer at quite an early stage in the film.  Had the writer and director decided to make this into a whodunnit with lots of twists and red herrings this would have been a brilliant movie.  It wouldn't have been that difficult to do as the person who's playing the killer is so normal it would have been difficult to guess.

The other thing would be her relationship with her son.  There's just too little here.  At times, you even forget she's a mother.  Who know's there may be some of these scene's laying on the cutting room floor.  I just think it would have strengthened her character and added a few heartwarming and tearful scenes.  This, in turn, could have branched off a story arch where they, as a family, developed more - especially the climax, which was over a little too fast.  With an added threat to her son, the director could have ramped up the tension so the audience was on the edge of their seats.

Those are my only quirks as the film is well directed and acted throughout.  There is one scene which is especially great.  After killing an elderly resident, the killer sits back while sipping tea.  It's the exhale of their deep breath, the look of calm satisfaction, and the shudder of utter bliss, which gave me the shivers right down to the bone.

If you love your thrillers without the mystery element then I'd recommend this film to you.  It's an engrossing and entertaining way to waste an hour or two.

I give this a watchable 7 out of 10

The Trailer

Movie Review - The Brain Machine

The Brain Machine

1955

The Cast

To watch this film you have to remember it's set in the '50's and the idea at the start of the picture was revolutionary.  Using an ECG a couple of doctors are able to diagnose a person's mental health.  On one occasion they bring in a deranged killer to get a reading.  Then later, they have an accident victim who they scan for brain damage.  upon checking his scan they see he has some alarming similarities with the killer.  Before they can question him he leaves the hospital.  The story then starts to take a weaving path to its conclusion.

It's this path that makes the movie watchable as you wonder what's happening and what will happen next.  It's the pace of the movie and the acting which hinder the movie somewhat.  The bad guy, Frank Smith (Maxwell Reed) just doesn't have the aura of a psychopathic madman - he sure does know how to shout though.  It would have been a lot better had he run a gamut of emotions to show his mental breakdown.

I also liked the fact that the female Doctor Philippa Roberts (Elizabeth Allan) is a strong woman that knows and says her mind.  Unfortunately, she loses this confidence when she is kidnapped by Smith.  Again, this would have been great had she retained this and not regressed into screaming woman.  But this was made in the '50's so has their ideals.

I reckon this story would still make a good movie today, even a great one if the issues are addressed as I can still see the issues used in the story being relevant today.

If you like your old black and white mysteries, then you may like this.  But be aware, this is not the best of it's kind.  Definitely, one to watch when sick in bed... though remember to keep the remote handy for when things get shouty.

I give this an old average of 4.75 out of 10.

The Trailer

Movie Review - The Perfect Stalker

The Perfect Stalker

2016

The Cast

  

In this film, we have the story of a woman supposedly suffering from HPD - Histrionic Personality Disorder.  And the opening sequence, except for the psychiatrist scene, sets the rest of the film up brilliantly.  The trouble with the psychiatrist scene is that it all feels too staged.  It's quickly edited and after only one session the shrink knows what's going to happen - she appears more a fortune teller than a doctor.  It's the way this is delivered and shot that made me cringe inside.  It all feels like it's only been added to the film to make everything black and white for the viewer.  Give your audience credit, they probably could have figured out the storyline without this horrid scene.

However, that said the rest of the film bears no resemblance to this scene.  The director, Curtis Crawford is pretty adept at using lighting, camera work, and location to set the scenes with atmosphere and tension.  Though a couple of scenes could have been a little longer to build the tension a little more.  It's a shame that he lets the pace slow down a little near the climax when it should be climbing to its zenith.

The acting is above average and I have to say that there is a brilliant scene where Grace (Savre) cuddles up with her man, Robert (Brown), and the look on her face is just so creepy and chilling - awesome scene, nice and powerful.  This is one of those movies where the actors really do believe that there are no small parts, for they all give their best, which adds to the power and believability of the story.

As for the story, it's been done before and though there's nothing really new it's still a strong tale.  Yes, it might have been nice to see a little more about Grace's background.  Not that she may have been through some trauma which has lead her down this path, but of her relationship with her husband as it's evident at the start of the movie he really loves her.  A little bit more background leading up to her condition and his death would have made the story stronger.  If the writers could have added a few lesser used scenarios and twists this again could have made it stronger.

However, this is a watchable and enjoyable thriller which I would recommend to lovers of this genre and to those who haven't watched this style of film before.  If there also happens to be little on to watch when it's raining or snowing outside, this isn't a bad one for a duvet day.

I give this an enjoyable average 5.5 out of 10.

The Trailer

Movie Review - 31

31

2016

Bow And Arrow Entertainment / PalmStar Media / Protagonist Pictures / Spectacle Entertainment Group / Spookshow International / Windy Hill Pictures

Fathom Events / Saban Films / Vertigo Releasing / Lionsgate Home Entertainment

5 / 10

If it hadn't been for The House Of A 1000 Corpses, The Devil's Rejects, and The Haunted World Of El Superbeasto then I would not have watched this movie, especially after what Rob Zombie did to the Halloween movies.  Unfortunately, this is not as good as his earlier works.

This is just another load of people who are captured, tortured, and killed for pleasure.  What Zombie adds to the story is a triumvirate of puppet masters - Father Murder (Malcolm McDowell), Sister Serpent (Jane Carr), and Sister Dragon (Judy Geeson) - who run The Murderworld where they run a torturous gauntlet of games.  The triumvirate gives their prisoners twelve hours to survive the trials they have arranged for them.  Each trial is to survive the psychopaths they send in dressed as clowns.

However, most of this doesn't work.  My heart started to sink when the group of carnies are talking about the rides and attractions that they run, though their RV isn't towing anything and there's no lorry travelling with them.  Then you learn they're travelling with a fair, yet again there are no other vehicles.  It's these little things which annoy, and there are quite a few throughout the film.  For such an unoriginal story ironing out ALL the kinks would have made it stronger.

As for the direction, it's pretty standard stuff though Zombie does try to add a little art to the affair by working in vivid colours.  This isn't fully utilised due to the average camera work.  There's also an alarming lack of suspense and tension, which a film of this type really requires.  That said there are a couple of nice scenes with Richard Brake, who plays Doom-Head, where the close ups are so sharp and crisp.  This brilliantly captures his Brake's magnificent rendition of his psychopath character.  To be honest, it's Brake that steals this film.  This actor should be used more often, he has some serious skills. 

As for the rest of the cast, they are okay, none of them particularly stands out.  I would've liked more details in both the story and characterisations of the triumvirate as this was a missed opportunity to add a spooky and eerie element.  Also the other clowns - heads - aren't anywhere nearly as disturbing or sinister as Brake's Doom-Head.  The brothers Schizo and Psych-Head, played by David Ury and Lew Temple, are your routine slashers, complete with chainsaws.  Though it's Sick-Head which lets the film down.  This is not due to Pancho Moler playing the part, on the contrary, his acting is pretty solid. It's down to Zombie dressing him as a Hitleresque character - complete with swastikas and moustache.  I'm sorry but I think if anybody was confronted by him they would probably die laughing.

Then there's the name of the movie... 31.  This actually references Halloween and is another missed chance to tie the games into Samhain or another "Dark" holiday, which would have made the story stronger.

This is an average film which has a few small drawbacks and a couple of benefits that levels the film to average, once again.  If you're a Rob Zombie fan then you may like this.  If it's cold and wet outside you could turn off the lights and settle back with this slasher flick, it's worth at least one viewing.

Video Nasty - Don't Go In The House

Don't Go In The House

1979

Turbine Films Inc.

Film Ventures International / G T O Films Ltd / Cinefear / Arrow Film Distributors Ltd.

5.5 / 10

This is a dark psychological thriller about the consequences of child abuse.  Donny Kohler is a man who is growing increasingly detached from his life.  One day, while he's at work he witnesses an accident which causes one of his work colleagues to catch on fire.  While the rest of the workforce rush about trying to help the man Donny stands transfixed and spellbound by the sight.

It brings back to him the memories of his mother's retribution for misbehaviour, where she would hold his hands and arms above the open flame of the kitchen hob.  This triggers his psychosis, flames cleanse the sins of man... and woman.

Kohler played admirably well by Dan Grimaldi - who is very good at making this psychopathic killer appear as normal - then sets out on his mission of cleansing his town.  The most chilling part of this film isn't the killing or the portrayal of Kohler, but the killing room.  Kohler covers the walls, floor and ceiling in sheet metal and adds a meat hook in the centre of the room, from which to hang his prey.  It's the idea that he's thought this through to this extent so as not to burn down his house that makes it a very creepy and chilling issue and adds a deep psychological darkness to the character. 

However, there are issues with the story, especially in correspondence with Kohler's character.  There are some scenes that don't quite gel with his personality.  And some of the directing could have been better.  The scene when Kohler goes out with his friend and ends up attacking his date is well thought out story-wise; however, it could have been acted and directed much better  There is a few scene's like this.

The director, Joseph Ellison, who co-scripted the story with writer Joe Masefield and Ellen Hammill, does create a good film with a variable pace and flow, which helps to create atmosphere and keep the viewers interested.  However, I feel he could have done more to bring it above average.

The acting is okay though nobody shines through or dominates the film.  This is a shame because I think if Dan Grimaldi was a little stronger in his craft it would have made the film a hell of a lot scarier,

Overall, the film suffers from averageness, though it is worth at least one watch.  This is a film I would love to see remade, though adding a stronger cast and director, as I believe the story could make a classic film.  I would gladly recommend the film to anybody who likes darker psychological thrillers and isn't too distressed by graphic and gory scenes.   This left a chill in my bones and I will be watching the film again.

Nergling - Video Nasties Scare - Don't Go In The House

Video Nasty - Cannibal Ferox

Cannibal Ferox

1981

Dania Film / Medusa Distribuzione / National Cinematografica

Indie Rights / Replay Video / Grindhouse Releasing / Image Entertainment

3.75 / 10

This is an atrociously dire film in every way.  The only silver lining was the premise of the story where three student anthropologists enter the Columbian jungles with the naive aim of disproving cannibalism.  They come across a couple of adventures who claim to have escaped from a cannibal tribe after they had devoured their colleague.  It's the twist in the story that could have saved this film had it been correctly explored and utilised.   This, however, isn't the case and there just isn't anything else that makes this a film to watch.

Other reviews state the film is so bad that it unintentionally makes you laugh... that wasn't my case.  What writer and director Umberto Lenzi gives his viewers is a lesson in the banal, boring, and tedious.

From the previously mentioned wasted story issue to the under-acted, over-acted, and wooden performances of the cast to the uninteresting and dreary direction to the worst and insipid locations available, this is a bad film.

However, there are a few issues which did earn it the rating I gave.  I did like the twist in the tale which wasn't fully envisioned.  There were actual moments when the cast got serious and wasn't too bad in their roles.  Even Giovanni Lombardo Radice, who was mostly ludicrously over-the-top, actually had a couple of moments where he was menacing and believable.  Then there was the glorious gorefest of the special effects, though these are expected to be bad, they never fail to entertain; the scene of the penis extraction brought a wince to my face.  However, even the effects aren't without their errors.  The way they are filmed is so matter-of-fact that they lose their shock value.

Then, of course, there's the animal cruelty as you are witness to the killing of a turtle and a wild boar.  I do hope these animals were to be used as sustenance and were subsequently eaten.  I must admit to not liking the thought of them being killed and then discarded for entertainment's sake, as these scenes were not required for the story.

This is not the best cannibal film:

For the best story and acting, watch Cannibal Holocaust
For an interesting twist on the genre, better story and acting, try Cannibal Apocalypse
For the best jungle location, I suggest you watch The Man From Deep River

Though, I will say I do not find the cannibal genre that interesting and even though these are better than Ferox they're still not brilliant.

Nergling - The Video Nasties Scare - Cannibal Ferox