Movie Review - 31

31

2016

Bow And Arrow Entertainment / PalmStar Media / Protagonist Pictures / Spectacle Entertainment Group / Spookshow International / Windy Hill Pictures

Fathom Events / Saban Films / Vertigo Releasing / Lionsgate Home Entertainment

5 / 10

If it hadn't been for The House Of A 1000 Corpses, The Devil's Rejects, and The Haunted World Of El Superbeasto then I would not have watched this movie, especially after what Rob Zombie did to the Halloween movies.  Unfortunately, this is not as good as his earlier works.

This is just another load of people who are captured, tortured, and killed for pleasure.  What Zombie adds to the story is a triumvirate of puppet masters - Father Murder (Malcolm McDowell), Sister Serpent (Jane Carr), and Sister Dragon (Judy Geeson) - who run The Murderworld where they run a torturous gauntlet of games.  The triumvirate gives their prisoners twelve hours to survive the trials they have arranged for them.  Each trial is to survive the psychopaths they send in dressed as clowns.

However, most of this doesn't work.  My heart started to sink when the group of carnies are talking about the rides and attractions that they run, though their RV isn't towing anything and there's no lorry travelling with them.  Then you learn they're travelling with a fair, yet again there are no other vehicles.  It's these little things which annoy, and there are quite a few throughout the film.  For such an unoriginal story ironing out ALL the kinks would have made it stronger.

As for the direction, it's pretty standard stuff though Zombie does try to add a little art to the affair by working in vivid colours.  This isn't fully utilised due to the average camera work.  There's also an alarming lack of suspense and tension, which a film of this type really requires.  That said there are a couple of nice scenes with Richard Brake, who plays Doom-Head, where the close ups are so sharp and crisp.  This brilliantly captures his Brake's magnificent rendition of his psychopath character.  To be honest, it's Brake that steals this film.  This actor should be used more often, he has some serious skills. 

As for the rest of the cast, they are okay, none of them particularly stands out.  I would've liked more details in both the story and characterisations of the triumvirate as this was a missed opportunity to add a spooky and eerie element.  Also the other clowns - heads - aren't anywhere nearly as disturbing or sinister as Brake's Doom-Head.  The brothers Schizo and Psych-Head, played by David Ury and Lew Temple, are your routine slashers, complete with chainsaws.  Though it's Sick-Head which lets the film down.  This is not due to Pancho Moler playing the part, on the contrary, his acting is pretty solid. It's down to Zombie dressing him as a Hitleresque character - complete with swastikas and moustache.  I'm sorry but I think if anybody was confronted by him they would probably die laughing.

Then there's the name of the movie... 31.  This actually references Halloween and is another missed chance to tie the games into Samhain or another "Dark" holiday, which would have made the story stronger.

This is an average film which has a few small drawbacks and a couple of benefits that levels the film to average, once again.  If you're a Rob Zombie fan then you may like this.  If it's cold and wet outside you could turn off the lights and settle back with this slasher flick, it's worth at least one viewing.

Video Nasty - The Funhouse

The Funhouse

1981

Universal Pictures / Mace Neufeld Productions

Universal Pictures / Arrow Films / MCA/Universal Home Video

6.25 / 10

This film goes to show how stringent the English film board was back in the eighties as this got an X certificate on release and then ended up banned...  and now in its UNCUT version, it rates a 15 certificate.

To be truthful though, after watching - and still viewing - films on the video nasties list I cannot understand why or how this film achieved a banned status.  In Tobe Hooper's other banned film Eaten Alive there are scene's of torture and animal cruelty, whereas in Funhouse there's nothing along these lines.  In fact, this is pretty standard fayre in the slasher mould.  There are rumours of the BBFC getting the certification wrong by choosing the wrong Funhouse to ban.  In 1977 there was a film released called The Last House On Dead End Street, which was nasty enough to make the list, though didn't, and had previously been released in 1972 as The Fun House - see my review here.

You have a deformed man who is unable to find love due to his looks and personality buying sexual favours from the carnival's fortune teller.  Unfortunately, for her, he finishes prematurely and when she demands money for services rendered he gets upset... and she gets dead.  This interlude is viewed by four teenagers who thought it would be fun to hide out in the ghost train.  Of course, one of them makes a noise and draws the attention of the deformed killer who must dispatch them to keep his secret safe.

Though the concept is good its development onto film is strained.  As most of the action takes place in a limited area Tobe Hooper should have tried to develop a tension of claustrophobia as our witnesses find it increasingly difficult to escape the funhouse.  However, the carny ride appears massive and unending - could it be a Gallifreyan Time Machine(?)  For me, there wasn't enough tension or excitement and at times I found my attention drifting.

The actors are above average and cope well with building their characters and making them realistic, though none of them stands out above the others.  It would have been nice to have been introduced to some of the major characters back stories and more personal insights so the viewers could relate to them a little more.  This would make their murders more emotionally stronger and bring the viewer into the story more.

There is one brilliant thing about this film and the writer, Lawrence Block, and the director should have tried to work it into the story more as it would have added more depth, mystery, and paranormal atmospheres if done correctly.  At each of the carnival's rides and shows, there's a barker shouting the attractions merits to entice the people in.  Though the barkers are constantly at their positions and could not be the same person, each one is played by Kevin Conway.  This is a subtle thing that when spotted adds a mysterious element to the story, which is then completely ignored.  It's like somebody had an idea but couldn't come up with a suitable resolution to it.

This is not a bad film, by any means, it's just average; one of those films you'd watch if you'd not seen it before and there was nothing else on.  Worth watching at least once.  Not Tobe Hoopers best film and not his worst.

Nergling - The Video Nasties Scare - The Funhouse

Movie Review - Girl House

Girl House

2014

Brookstreet Pictures : Lightning Entertainment / Signature Entertainment / eOne Films

6.75 / 10

This is the slasher picture of modern times.  In the era where webcams are becoming more popular, especially in the sex industry, this asks the question, do you know who's watching you?

Instead of cam'ing on their own, this brings a group of beautiful girls together at the Girl House owned and run my an internet entrepreneur.  This gives paying viewers a chance to watch the girls at sleep, rest, and play.  Unfortunately for the girls, one of their viewers is Loverboy, a mentally unstable character with a violent and abusive past.

Even though the characters are very stereotypical of this type of film the cast breath new life into them, especially Slaine who plays the troubled Loverboy.

It also helps that the directors Jon Knautz and Trevor Matthews have the skill to create tension and to be able to build up the pace and excitement when needed.  This, in turn, makes it an entertaining film.

One of the main things I loved about the film was the shallow character of Devon, played well by Alyson Bath.  Though it wasn't all down to her portrayal it was her character and how it changed once Loverboy attacked.  It's an original ending to the character, though totally believable and sad... and one of the reasons I liked the movie.  It just elevates it above a normal slasher flick.

There are a couple of issues that niggled me, I know that Loverboy needs to be a computer hacker to be able to find the Girl House, though his character doesn't come across as that type of person.  The other was the stereotypical killers mask... why did he even need to wear one, again it seemed out of character - it'd be nice if a stalker for once, didn't go, Myers, Voorhees or Leatherface, on us.

This is a decent film and at least worth watching once, even more so, if you like the genre.

Video Nasty - The Toolbox Murders

The Toolbox Murders

(1978)

Cal-Am Productions / Tony DiDio Productions : Cal-Am Artists / Blue Underground

6.75 / 10

One Man...  One Toolbox...  A Ski Mask...  A Mission From God!!!

This is one hell of a slasher flick, well the first half is when our ski-masked killer dispatches four women in the space of two nights.  His weapon of choice is whatever he pulls from his toolbox.

Dennis Donnelly paces the killing spree nicely as the killer taunts his victims before he drills, hammers, screws, and nails them (yes, I got the blatant symbolism).  After dispatching three in one night, he has to call it off due to the arrival of the police.  It's his fourth kill which is strangely beautiful as it's kinda choreographed to the song on the radio, "Pretty Lady" (this scene is on YouTube - no surprise).  I also liked the fact that actress Marianne Walter does the whole scene naked... and not for the reasons you think.  Here's the thing.  She is attacked while bathing and as far as I know we bathe in the nude (I do).  I don't think the killer's going to wait until she wraps a towel around her, let alone apply the "Tit-tape" so it doesn't fall down.  The positive side is that Walter is gorgeous, though I would've loved the scene had any woman done it, as it shows the reality of the situation.  I think the only actress that would dare do this at the moment is Milla Jovovich.

Sadly, the movie then stalls a little as it changes from murder to a mystery as our bad guy kidnaps a girl, then it's about finding her as well as the toolbox man.  This falls to her brother, his friend, and the police.  Thanks to the actors and the director, you begin to suspect people.

Then in the last section, the movie moves up a gear, though it never quite gets to the same speed as the start.  Here you find out the identity of the killer and his reasons, though they're a tad unlikely.  There are two driving forces to the psycho killer and they should be in conflict with each other, this made his actions seem implausible. Once you think you've got a handle on it, the twist kicks in.

I loved the fact that hardly any of the women screamed, they pleaded, they ran, they fought back, and even tried to bargain for their lives, which is more realistic than screaming your lungs out.

Most of the actors, at best, were above average.  The best scene goes to Cameron Mitchell (he of Bonanza fame) and adds a depth to the story and the character of Vance Kingsley.  Also, Wesley Eure for his sometimes creepy portrayal of Kent.

This was a walk down memory lane, back to the 80's when boundaries and censorship were being pushed.  If you want to know what the fuss was all about then take a look at this film and some of your queries will be answered.

Nergling - The Video Nasties Scare - The Toolbox Murders

Video Nasty - Visiting Hours

Visiting Hours

(1982)

Canadian Film Development Corporation / Filmplan / Victor Solnicki Productions :  20th Century Fox / Anchor Bay Entertainment / Shout Factory

8 / 10

I was surprised as I sat viewing this film to realise I had seen it before...  Evidently, back in 1989, ITV had shown the uncut version of the movie.  I find it amazing that I could remember the film so clearly after twenty-eight years.

Though I remembered the movie it never lessened the enjoyment of watching it again.  Notwithstanding the passage of years, this film is still strong and relevant today.

Lee Grant plays Deborah Ballin a news reporter who is campaigning for better rights for abused women.  While on her television show, Colt Hawker, played menacingly and darkly by Michael Ironside, watches with growing disdain for in his world women should know their place.  He takes it upon himself to send Ballin a message by killing her.  He fails dismally, leaving her wounded.  Her death now becomes his mission.  He starts to stalk the hospital where she's receiving medical attention and the bodies start to stack up - and not due to natural causes.

What the director, Jean-Claude Lord (Second Chances - reviewed on this blog & Secrets of the Summer House - to be reviewed), gives the audience is an above par slasher film, with a nice psychological thriller twist.  It's superior to others in the genre as it gives a credible back story to the psychopathic killer, which in turn adds a chill because it shows he's not a monster, just a man.

Lord gives the audience a roller coaster ride as he speeds up the action and slows down for tension and suspense.  The use of a more natural light is a bonus for the viewers when most of these films hide everything in the darkness of shadows, Lord shows you the menace at all times.  This is a good thing as Ironside does a wonderful portrayal of Hawker, who is a chameleon... a man of many differing faces, though a madman under the skin.

I really liked the fact that Nurse Sheila Munroe, veritably portrayed by Linda Purl, doesn't let too much get to her.  As a nurse, she's used to seeing death and dead people, though not murder victims.  This is shown through her reactions, she doesn't scream uncontrollably, she is shocked but remains in control of herself.  She is a good strong female character.

It's Ballin that loves to scream and flail about and this is the only downside to the movie.  I know it's strange, I love slasher films but cannot abide screaming.  What I cannot abide is unnecessary screaming.  For the most part, when faced with something indescribably terrible most people will utter expletives rather than scream, come on directors lets keep it real.

If you like slasher psychopaths on a rampage then this is a movie for your delectation.

Nergling - The Video Nasties Scare - Visiting Hours